10th September

I am not sure if you still feeling tired. I don't dare to sms you these few days as I afraid it will pressurise you further and making you more tired. Even a good morning or good night sms to you I also need to think for some time. Don't misunderstood that recently, I didn't sms you is I am tired of you. My feelings for you is still the same but I just afraid I might over water the plant again...

When you msn me that night that you initiated a breakup with him and told him the reason is you want to be with me, I was very happy but at the same time, I was surprise. I don't know I have reach so far in your heart. I feel so bad for misunderstood you in the past, sometime even doubting what you said. I am sorry. :(

Restarting and adapting is part of life. When you move house, switch job, parting and knowing new people, etc, all these are restarting. You need to learn to adapt to the new environment. Maybe your previous experience make you don't dare to try again but can't just because of a fall, you don't dare to stand up again or just choose to stay put.

I guess in your heart, you already choose to "restart" but you feeling "pity" because you had put in so much effort in the relationship and you don't bear to see it gone down the drain despite the numerous disappointment he given you. That why you are confused whether to give up and deceive yourself to remember the good of him and not the bad. When it is meant to end, no point holding on...

Don't feel sad because it ended but happy because a new beginning has began. I know no matter what I say now is nothing but empty promise and you still have doubt and afraid we might not turn out well. I don't know what I need to do in order to gain your trust. All I can hope is you can believe me, close your eyes, give me your hand, I will face everything with you. I will definitely treat you better than him. I will try my best not to let you experience sadness or disappointment... at least not from me. :) By now, you should know how I am to you and I don't think I want to repeat saying it anymore. I will be waiting for your answer and I got a feeling it will be coming soon...

I don't know if you feel the same as me... I feel today lunch you are happier than the previous few days.. I saw your laughter and this make me happy also. I wish we can be like this forever.. I thought when I occupied myself with work, I will not think of other things. I realised I am wrong, even when I am busy with the shutdown preparation, I will still think of you, occasionally still turn back to look at you. I think you had occupied an important place in my heart and I really don't wish to lose you, but I know this can't be forced.. I just want to let you know no matter how busy I am, I will not neglect you. I know you are shopping for handphone, I wonder if I have the honor to shop it with you?